Saturday, December 19, 2009


So, Avatar was awesome. I haven't been this excited to see a movie in a long time, and I was happy Avatar delivered. This is definitely a movie I recommend you see in the theatre, and in 3D. I imagine that this movie loses something from 3D to 2D, and a lot from the big screen to the small screen.

I would go on, but I fear I would get spoilerish, so I am going to stop.

Thursday, November 19, 2009

The Church of Unicorn

So I have been neglecting this little slice of the Internet. Work has been busy. I took a promotion and so I have been busy handing off the duties of my old job while learning the ropes of my new one. Fall shows are in full swing. The house always needs cleaning. The kids are cute and deserve some attention. Excuse, other excuse, made up excuse.

So, I am cranking things up for another blog. I wanted to write about the kid who won't say the pledge because he does not believe that our country currently has, Liberty and justice for all. How he he gets what it means to be an American, than any of the talking heads on FOX news (or CNN and MSNBC for that matter). Liken him to our founding fathers, then ramble on about how if they were alive today they would be deeply saddened with the state of our political system.

I'm not going to do that though. I am going to talk about how if a religion had incorporated Unicorns into it's lore, I would most likely pray at that church.

Now, I often find myself posting religious posts in nature. Mainly because people don't seem to like it when I ramble on how Scientology while ridiculous is no more ridiculous than Catholicism. How I think that it is crazy that people spend their whole lives devoted to something, giving money to something, in the hopes that they are saved upon death, only to potentially just die. Then go on to tell them that I do actually believe in god, just no their god. That is the part that bugs them the most.

As of today, I have decided that my god rides a unicorn. Because Unicorns are awesome.

My god also likes pranks. He (yes my god is a dude, deal with it) has always felt that for the most part, he will let us live our lives and let things run their course. He's the parents that lets us make mistakes, and then learn from them. Except for the times when we can't find our keys the days we are running late for work, or the remote when the channel is on Yo Gabba Gabba, and the new episode of the Office is on. When you trip in the hall, on nothing, that's my god.

He also is a big fan of MASH. The years with Frank Burns and Col. Potter.

My god is also okay that you feel it necessary to worship your gods. He get's it, and is cool like that.

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Happy Birthday Sesame Street

So if you have not heard, it is Sesame Street's 40th Birthday today. So in honor of the show that helped shape my youth, here are some of my favorite moments. If you want to see more, I recommend you check out here. Trevor and I spent a lot of time watching videos.

And my all time favorite.

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Jimmy Fallon, Artie Lange, and Olivia Munn= Genius

Stumbled across this gem of an interview. Thank me later.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

A Bra that will save your life....

So, an article at CNN had been peaking my interest for a while. It had to do with some lady winning some sort of award for her Bra/Gas Mask. Turns out that during the time that the actual Nobel Prizes are handed out, an organization called Improbable Research. They hand out the Ig Nobel Prizes.

Go here to see the full list of awards and winners.

Here is a quick highlight of some of the awards.

Peace Prize: Went to some guys who did a study to see if it was better to be hit over the head with a full or empty beer bottle.

Chemistry: Some guy who created diamonds fom Tequilla.

Medicine: To a guy who each day for 60 years cracked the knuckles on one hand and not the other to see if cracking knuckles causes arthritis.

Public Health: To the lady who created a bra that could be used as a gas mask.

So if you are not able to be the President after George Bush, and thus win the Nobel Peace Prize. Maybe you could negotiate a peace accord between the children of the Hatfields and McCoys and get yourself the Ig Nobel Prize.

Friday, October 2, 2009

I'll take the salad.

So, I have never really been able to get behind salads. To much ruffage I always say. I'm not a rabbit. So I stay away from them. I don't think I have ever tasted Thousand Island Dressing and I don't like Ranch. French? If it is followed by fries or toast, OK. Otherwise I think I will pass.

I can do a fruit salad. The problem with fruit salad is the time it takes to make it. With your standard lettuce or spinach based salad, you have a fairly easy to prepare base. A fruit based salad does not. Unless you use grapes, but grapes does not a good fruit salad make.

If you have talked to me about salads, you have most likely heard me mention meat salad. I don't think such a thing exists, but if it did, I would be all about it. Maybe with a nice BBQ dressing.

That being said, I am doing the unthinkable, and adopting a diet in which salads will play a role.

Breakfasts, I have been going with Smoothies (Low Fat Yogurt, Two Oranges, Handful of Strawberries, and a Banana) or an English Muffin. For lunch, most days I have gone with a Spinach Salad with strawberries and Banana slices. Then whatever I want for dinner.

I eventually plan on venturing our to different salads, but am happy for now. If nothing else, I don't need to worry about coming down with scurvy anymore.

Sunday, September 27, 2009


So, it's my son's 9th birthday today. I say this every year, but it is crazy that I have a 9 year old son. I still remember finding out that I was going to be a father, I still remember that Nell was the first person that we told, and calling my parents. I remember going into the hospital an Trevor being born...and watching the olympics with the doctor.

I remember taking him on walks through our old neighborhood, and playing at the park. We would go to the museum at the University and sit and look at the exhibits. It was nice having the varied schedule, and getting to spend full days with him during the week. One of the perks of being in college and having a baby.

I remember dropping him off at day care, and him crying.

I remember that feeling of being proud of him, maybe for a good grade or when he did something really nice for someone without being asked.

Being 9 means he is halfway to 18. I look forward to just as many memories in the coming 9.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

Chickens everywhere cower in terror...

So most of you have probably seen this by now, but I still find it hilarious. FYI, video not safe for work.

For those of you that didn't catch it, the anchor tells the weather guy to, "Keep F#@$ing that chicken." Which makes no sense. Here are some of my favorite parts.

1. The weather man then says, "Okay I'll do that." Then shrugs like I have no idea what is going on. I am sure later he realized he agreed to. Which based on the statement means he has been F@#$ing a chicken, since he was told to keep doing it.

2. The other Anchors face is priceless.

3. If you listen to the rest of it, the Anchor starts commenting on the tease for the next story, about his co-anchor working out. She finally jut has to stop her tease because her time is up.

4. The first line the anchor gives is fairly funny as well, "It takes a tough man to give a tender forecast Nick." Just a bunch on nonsense.

All very funny stuff.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Top 5 D-Bag

So I have noticed a lot of really classy moements by some people in the public eye as of late, so I thought I would roll out another top 5 list, of some recent Douche Bags.

So in no particular order.

1. Kanye West. Now I used to like Kanye. He has done some crazy things in the past (I don't think Mike Meyers will ever be the same)but his crazy antics have gone to far. At the recent VMA's, Taylor Swift won some award (honestly does anyone even care? Which makes what Kanye is about to do even more douchey). In the middle of her speech Kanye takes the stage, takes the mike from her, and says that Beyonce should have won the award. Talor Swift is like 19, and just won her first VMA. She is trying to say her thank you's, and she has this D Bag, taking the mike and telling her someone else should have won. Now Kanye has done this before, but it was when he lost, not someone else. Hopefully he is left off award show invite lists from now on.

2. Joe Wilson. Have you heard about this guy. No? Here is a clip.

That guy you heard yelling "You Lie" Is currently a member of the House of Representatives, and a Republican. He decided that it was a good idea to heckle the President of the United States during a nationally televised speech. Now you may not always agree with the president, heck I disagreed with most everyhing the previous administration did. I would have the tact not to call him a liar during a speech though.

3. Serena Williams. Unless you watch a lot of sports coverage you may not have seen this one, or know who Serena Williams is. She is a very accomplished Womens Tennis Player. Argueably the best of the last 10-15 years. In a recent match she let out this tirade.

So, Serena was called for a foot fault, and decided to essentially tell the line judge that called it she was going to shove the ball down her throat. Classy. The kicker is that for her outburst she was assesed a point penalty, which cost her the match.

4. Michael Crabtree. So this is a football player, who was drafted by the SF 49ers. Going into the draft a lot of people said he was a high matinence, a PrimaDonna. Instead of coming in and working hard, he has refused to sign a contract. He is asking to be paid as if he were drafted in the top 5 spots in the draft, why you ask, because many Mock Drafts had him going in the top 5. Trouble is, he was drafted #10. In the NFL paying a draftee is fairly straight forward. You get less than the person before you, and more than the person after you. Crabtree has said he will sit out the year, and enter the draft again next year. Now while most of us would love to play a profesional sport a a career and get paid millions to do it. This guy is willing to sit out, not get paid, because his feelings go hurt. What a role model.

5. Jay Leno. So he hasn't really done anything lately to deserve this, but I really don't like Jay Leno. I really hate that he is taking up 5 hours of Prime Time TV this upcoming season. 5 hours that could have given us the next LOST, Office, or How I Met Your Mother. The 30 minute Comedy has been dying out for some time, and if I see another CSI, NCIS, or Law and Order spin off I might punch someone. Now we've got Jay, taking over the air. My fear is that people are going to watch, and next year CBS will give some crappy talking head 5 hours of airtime, then ABC and FOX.

Friday, September 11, 2009


I have spent time today, remembering 8 years ago. I'm not sure if it is because Sophia is the exact age Trevor was when 9/11 occur ed, or if the memory is starting to fade into snapshots, so I want to fight to hold onto what I remember of that day.

Eight years ago, I was a Junior in college. Trevor was almost 1, and Mandy and I had been married that summer. I woke up that morning, and remember heading to the basement to check my email, among other things. I went to, and remember seeing what I know now was a picture of smoke pouring out of the Twin Towers, the planes had just hit. I was interested into how the Brewers did the night before. A large smoking building didn't register with me. I went upstairs, and we had turned on toon Disney or Nickelodeon for Trevor. It was one of the only channels that was not covering what happened. I went on that morning for quite some time, oblivious to events that would change our country forever.

Not until our sitter showed up and made mention that a plane had hit one of the towers of the World Trade Center. We were on our way to class, but I remember speculating that it must have been a small personal plane. It had happened before, but I didn't think much of it.

In the car on the way to class, the world now knew that both towers had been hit by planes, the local radio station had switched over to one of the national affiliates for coverage.

I remember I had a Poli Sci class with Professor Reily. He gave us the option of having class or watching coverage. We unanimously chose to watch coverage. This was around the time the towers fell. It was hard to comprehend, I remember seeing just a huge cloud of smoke/dust, and the reporters saying that the towers had fell.

At this point you start realizing that this was not an accident, that this was something planned. Reports of the plane hitting the Pentagon started coming out, along with reports of another missing plane. You start to wonder if you knew anyone flying that day, and worse, what was going to get hit next.

I doubt anyone had class that day, but most of my classes were full. It's like people didn't want to sit and watch coverage alone. Everyone's confidence/faith was shaken.

The largest room in the Comm building had a large projector screen TV, and there was a constant stream of traffic in and out of it. People would stop in and get filled in on what new info had come out.

How many were missing?

How many people are they saying were in the buildings?

A plane went down in Pennsylvania?

Was it terrorists?

I hear gas prices are going up?

Have we retaliated yet?

I think people wanted to ask, more than they wanted answers.

I went to work at Rogans, we had very few people come in, but it gave us time to speculate as to what happened. My theory was that the pilots were working for the terrorists, that the plot had been in the works for years. No way would a pilot be forced to fly into the buildings.

We stood in front of the store and watched the line for gas form, and stretch down the road.

We wondered if we should go over and buy supplies at the grocery store.

None of us had been through anything like this, so none of us knew how to act. I think in the back of our heads we thought of war time, air raids, rations.

Being in college allowed me to stay up all hours of the night. Being a Comm major, it fascinated how long the networks went without breaking for a commerical, and how many channels were showing coverage. You could flip through the channels and 9 times out of 10 land on coverage of the attacks.

I remember the nation coming together. We were all just citizens for those few days. No Republicans or Democrats, nobody leaned let or right, we all stood up together against the unknown.

I want to remember this day, and remember the unity that it gave us. As a nation we have moved far from that unity. I hope that one day we can come together again, I just hope it doesn't take a disaster to do it.

Friday, September 4, 2009

Early Draft

I have been forwarded an early draft of a rebuttal to the upcoming Obama speech to students, to be given next week Tuesday. Enjoy

Students, Teachers, Parents, most of you have just listened to President Obama, and his message to the youth of America. You heard him discuss the merits of staying in school, working hard, and getting good grades. He told you of the work he put in to get accepted in college, and the rewards he has reaped from a good education.

My friends, I am here to tell you today, that you don't have to listen to this Democratic rhetoric. All too long, they have bemoaned the merits of a good education. They have labored on how one must pay attention in class, study at night, and if at all possible pursue an education beyond the 13 years that you are already forced to go through.

My friends, I am here to tell you that they challange that President Obama laid before you, will be a set up to failure for most of you. The democrats idea of education has become misplaced over the years. It is time we as a country took a stand to change this.

I remember sitting on my Grandparents porch, my friends, and listening to my Grandfather talk about how he decided that after his second day of fourth grade, that school wasn't for him. He spent the next six years pretending to go off to school, but instead he would sneak down to the local trout stream, and spend his day fishing. Now some of you may be thinking that how can a man with a limited education go on to be somebody. My friends, I stand here before you today, to tell you of the success my Grandfather made for himself, a success that was not learned in a book or a class room. He went on to win the Winchester County Trout Fish Off, three times in his life. THREE TIMES! Those are lessons learned on the banks of the stream of life, not in the classroom my friends. Don't let the Democrats and their socialist agenda stop you from finding your Trout Stream.

My friends, as I travel the country I see many people, who have overcome the chains put on them to learn in a formal school setting, achieve greatness. I met a gentleman in Randolph, Nebraska, who has made quite a nice business for himself, even though he never graduated High School. Thousands of people stop at his general store each month, and have their picture taken next to Nebraska's largest ball of twine. After deciding that his conservative viewpoints were not being appreciated in our countries liberal school system, he went to work bailing hay at a local farm. At times throughout the day, the twine would get stuck in the bailer, since he had not yet reached manhood, it was his job to climb into the machinery, cut and restring the twine. Not wanting to leave the twine in the field, he would ball it up and put it in his pocket. Each day when he got back to his trailer, he would put the twine from the day, in a pile on his dining/living/bedroom table. After six months or so the pile was so big it starting spilling over into his den/bathroom/library. He realized he needed to do something with it, so he balled it up and put it in his yard. One morning on his way to the farm, he noticed a bus of tourists had stopped and was standing in his yard as people took turns having their picture taken in front of it. As they left, they gave him a $20 bill. From there his dream was born.

While I respect President Obama, I am against this notion that we have a one size fits all education system. Each child should have a choice as to how they pursue their dreams, they shouldn't be force fed into the book and paper system that the Obama administration is pushing on the kids of America. A class room is not the only place to learn, and a teacher is not the only person who can teach.

My friends, I encourage you to sit down as family's tonight. Discuss the merits of studying hard. Talk about your experiences with reading, riting, and rithmatic, and if at the end of the day if really got you anything. Is knowledge really power?

Book learning may have helped President Obama reach his place of power, a power that I feel he misused today. If the previous administration showed us anything though, it showed us that it does not take a high level of intellect to reach the office of President.

Thank you my friends, and God bless America!

Thursday, September 3, 2009


So I am taking part in a Leadership program here in Portage County. There is a group of appx 26 other community members in the program. Each month we get together to learn about different areas of industry in our community, and different leadership strategies/qualities/ideas.

Today's program focused on the history of Portage County and Agriculture. We toured the county, lead by a member of the local historical society. It is amazing to learn about all the history that our county has.

I learned about the polish community that came to Stevens Point, how one man helped move over 1000 families to the area. I visited a church in a small community outside of town that Pope John Paul II visited while he was a Cardinal. Toured a Griss mill, and got to see a china set, where each plate is now worth an estiated $500.

I also toured a Mega Farm. It was a lot different from the farms of my friends from High School. This farm was currently milking around 700 cows. They run 24 hours a day, doing three milkings. They have 7 employees that handle the milking, and they have an amazingly simple process and set up.

They also have a manure digester, the first one of it's kind in the state. This machine turns manure into methane gas, which helps power their farm. They also put energy back into the grid, enough to run 100 homes. Here is where I learned that the manure needs to be kept at 100 degrees in order to produce bacteria, which produces the best methane.

This digester also puts out fertilizer for the fields, and bedding for the cows.

A funny exchange took place today, after a question on breeding.

Farmer: When looking at breeding cows, we look for the ones with the best legs and hooves and healthy udders.

Guy in the crowd: So just like the rest of us.

It was very interesting listening to the farmer talk about the politics of farming, and his views on restrictions put on him because he is a Mega Farm, which are not put on smaller farms.

We are going to have the chance to tour an organic farm, where I assume I am going to get a very different point of view.

Anyway, the moral of this story is, is that I had a very fun day, and got to get back together with a great group of people.

I highly encourage you to see if the community you live in has a similar program, and look into it. If it is anything like this program, you won't be disappointed.

Friday, August 28, 2009

I want to win the lottery

So, coming to Phoenix for work, reminds me how much I have come to love to travel. Phoenix seems like a great city to explore, but all I got to see was the highway to and from the airport, the hotel, and California Pizza Kitchen. The atmosphere is so different here. Something about drivin through neighborhoods of lawns full of cactuses that just looks cool. I got to see the sunrise over the mountains this morning, which was an amazing site.

I feel fortunate that work sends me different places throughout the year, but I really wish I could travel with family and friends, as it would make the whole experience more enjoyable.

I know that I don't need to win the lottery to travel, but it sure would help. The tradeshow I was at, was at a very nice resort. I was also lucky that the show organizers upgraded me to a suite. So I hade a nice big room, access to the Regency Club, which had free food and drinks. These are not things that we would most likely be able to afford if we were to travel now.

Sounds like my plane is boarding.

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Count Dracula reads my blog!

So everyonce in a while, I check in on Google Analytics. I am always interested to see where people that read my blog live. When I checked today I saw that someone from Romania has visited my blog.

I am fairly positive that it is Count Dracula.

It only makes sense.

Monday, August 24, 2009

Pirates and Ninjas

So I was listening to a podcast the other day, and they mentioned how the Internet (especially Facebook) to allow for a couple of things to really become popular.

Ninjas, Pirates, Zombies, Bacon, LOL Catz

This got me thinking, in 200 years, what will modern day profession will equate to their Ninjas and Pirates. (Of course, Zombies, Bacon, and LOL Catz will still be around, they are timeless)

Thinking it through, these two professions have very different traits, so when looking for the modern day equivalent you have to first understand what traits to look for.

Let's start with Ninjas. Ninjas are stealthy, they like to cut people with swords, you often don't know who they are, they potentially can be hired, and usually have a higher set of morals.

Potential Modern day Ninja Candidates:

Spy: Like Ninja, Spy is very general. It does not tie you down to one country. Spy could be someone in the CIA, KGB, or a double O. You often don't know who they are, and they have been known to use a sword.

Serial Killers: I know, the fist thing you think is you said higher set of morals. I argue this point with the fact that in 200 years, serial killers will be glamorized by Dexter. People will have forgotten the Ted Bundys and Jeffrey Dahmers and will be enamored by the killer you can take home to mom, Dexter Morgan. So along with that, you have a secret identity, and he knows his way around a knife.

Power Rangers: Don't laugh. They pretty much are modern day ninjas. Just crayola ninjas. In 200 years, time will again have washed away the campiness, an Power Rangers will be revered. Or they will be just as campy, which in turn will make it super cool.

Wild Card:
Teachers: In 200 years you will most likely take a pill when you hit 5, and instantly know everything. So teachers will become these mythical outlaw characters, that swoop in and teach you things, that you never thought you would know. Like long division, and the countries of the world. You will wake up the next day and think it was all a dream, until you find a paper on your desk, where you showed your work. The most mind blowing part will be paper.

Now on to Pirates. Pirates are lawless, dirty, willing to kill for a dirty glass of whiskey. They are loud, and if people don't know who you are, then you are not a good pirate.

Potential Modern Day Pirate Candidates

Republicans: There are many strong Republican personalities that are very polarizing, just like most pirates. You have your Rush Limbaugh's and Ann Coulters. Loud, brash, morally crooked. They often travel in groups, and as of late seem to like to launch attacks on unsuspecting people. They also now seem to carry loaded weapons into public places. All very Pirate like.

Terrorists: Nothing funny here about terrorism, just some very similar parallels. All lawless, willing to do underhanded things. They have secret hideouts, and are scattered all over the world. In 200 years, it is possible terrorist will be viewed as we view Pirates today.

80's/90's Movie Action Heroes: Your Steven Segals, Jean Claude VanDammes, Arnolds, Stalone's, and of course, Chuck Norris. Again as time moves on, reality an fiction tend to blur. The children of 2209 will sit down and watch Predator, Blood Sport, Under Siege, and Missing in Action, and see these men who lived outside of the law. Kicked Ass and took names.

Wild Card:

Pirates: The Pirates of today, could be the Pirates of tomorrow. While they are not as well known, there still are Pirates. From what I have heard, they make quite a good living for themselves. It is possible they are just waiting it out, to make a huge media blitz and rise into stardom. Or not.

Anyway, I would be happy to hear your thoughts.

Sunday, August 2, 2009

Top 5 Movies that Make me Cry

So I should know better than to create this list. I caught the end of one of these movies today, and in those 5 minutes I got that lump in my throat. So in my commitment to creating top 5 lists, here we are.

Before I jump into it, I am a crier at movies. I mean I teared up during the first few minutes of Star Trek. I have learned how to hold the tears in, in most cases, but these five typically bring them out.

So in no particular order.

1. Island of the Blue Dolphins.

This makes the list as it is the first movie I remember crying during. I watched it in 2nd grade. This movie is chalk full of sad moments. Kids get left behind, brother dies, dog dies. All tear jerking moments. I often project myself into the movies that I am watching. Being a kid, watching a movie with kids, made it easy to put myself into their shoes. Which makes it all the more emotional. Even sadder note, this is based on a true story, the main character lives alone for 18 years, finally gets rescued and then dies 7 weeks later of dysentery.

2. Empire of the Sun.

One of my favorite movies. I also remember watching this movie as a young kid. Again I was able to relate to Christian Bale's character. I was able to think about how i would feel if I was in similar situations. Now that I have a son of my own, when I watch the movie I relate with how the parents must feel, not knowing where their son is, or if he is still alive. This movie contains many tear jerker moments. We start off with Jim, getting separated from his parents on a crowded street, this is both a child's and a parent's nightmare. Then there is a scene where Jim tries to remember what his parents look like, and he can't remember. I hope to never have that moment. The other moments that stick out are the scene where Jim and the Japanese boy are together, and the Japanese boy is going to cut open a melon with a sword. A character that Jim had clung to mistook this for the Japanese boy attacking Jim, and shoots him. Then the scene at the end of the movie, where Jim's parents are at the orphanage and Jim and his mother find each other. A happy moment, but I cry like a school girl.

3. Grave of the Fireflies

If it wasn't for a movie class I took in college, I most likely would never have come across this movie. The story is about two children, a brother and a sister in Japan during WWII. Their father is in the Japanese Navy. During a fire bombing of their city their home is destroyed and their mother dies. The movie chronicles the two of them trying to survive on their own. This movie will rip your heart out over and over again. It is a cartoon, which allows for some haunting imagery. Eventually the two of them end up living in a cave. Their is a scene with the sister is so hungry and delirious that she makes food out of sand. It's a movie that shows how war impacts everyone involved, not just the soldiers but families at home as well. This is a hard movie to watch, but it is one I highly recommend.

4. Field of Dreams

This movie is on the list for one scene, when he asks his dad if he can have a catch. For Christs sake, I am tearing up just writing this. It get's me every time.

5. AI: Artificial Intelligence

So this movie is the reason for this list. I haven't found many people that like this movie like I do. To me it is a great story, it came from the minds of two filmmakers I enjoy, with Kubrick spending many years working on the film and Spielberg directing it. This film again has many moments that make me well up, from when David is being taken to be decommissioned and his "mother" can't go through with it so she leaves him in the woods, the scene where Teddy and David get separated, and the final sequence, where David get's to spend one last day with his mother. It's this perfect blend of happiness and overwhelming sadness.

So there you are. Five movies you can use to mock me mercilessly for ever.

Honorable Mention
The Notebook
Where the Red Fern Grows

Saturday, August 1, 2009

Busses and Baptists

So the doorbell rang today. Opening the door is often like opening a present. Sometimes it is something awesome, like a Kitana Blade, then sometimes it is not awesome, like a DVD box set of One Tree Hill.

Today when I opened the door I thought I was getting One Tree Hill, but I ended up with a Kitana.

At the door were two girls, I am going to assume around 12, holding pamphlets, long hair, glasses, and in skirts. So I assumed they were gypsies, I was close, Baptist.

Here is a recap of the conversation.

Me: Hello

Religious Girl: Hello, do you have any children that would like to ride our bus?

Me: (Confused look on my face) Uhhh, Is the bus here?

Religious Girl: (Laughing) No, it's not.

Me: Well...Where does the bus go?

Religious Girl: Oh... It goes to the Greater Point Baptist Church, do you have a child that might be interested. August is Ice Cream month.

Me: I have Trevor here (I point in at Trevor) but I don't really think he would be interested (At this point I considered bringing Trevor over, to discuss Jesus with them, I thought it would be funny to see him berate them for not believing in Dinosaurs, I decided that is not what Jesus would do, so I sparred them)

Religious Girl: Could I tell you a little more about it.

Me: Sure!

Religious Girl: Well in August we are going to have a thirty foot Banana Split, give away Culvers Gift cards, and make the world's largest milk shake.

Me: I don't really think we would be interested. (At this point, I am on the verge of laughter)

Religious Girl: Here is some info if you change your mind.

Me: Thanks!

First off, I feel bad that someone is making these girls go door to door on a Saturday morning to pimp out their church. Second her pitch was horrible. She literally said, "Do you have any children that would like to ride our bus?", no info on what the bus was, who they were, where the bus went. All I knew was they had a bus, that would come at sometime, and take my kid someplace.

Then all she talked about was Ice Cream. I mean it did have garner some interest from Trevor afterwards, but you've really got to tell me more about what is going on.

Though on the info they gave me, it has a prayer it says is guaranteed to get you into heaven. So I will probably hang onto it just in case.

Monday, July 27, 2009

Birthday Wishes Part II

So there is another special lady that has a birthday today. I have known her for almost 10 years now, and she is one of my closest friends.

That's right: Maya Rudolph

Maya joined the cast of SNL in the 1999-2000 season. This is when our friendship began. I always looked forward to our Saturday nights together. She always knew how to make me laugh.

Our friendship really took off in 2006 when she played the roll of Rita in Idiocracy. No one can play a Hooker from the past stuck in a world of stupid people like she can.

She is one special lady. So on this day July 27th, if anyone other than my mother deserves to be wished a Happy Birthday it is her.

Happy Birthday Maya!!

Birthday Wishes

So today is my Mom's birthday. I have a lot of great things that I can say about her, but wanted to take the time to touch on one subject. My mom is one of the main reasons that I enjoy sports. My mother is the one that watches the Packers, Badgers, and Brewers. You can find her on a Saturday afternoon, wearing her Badger red, sitting on the edge of her seat as the Badgers are faced with 4th and long. Or up on Monday night watching the end of the Packers game.

I also spent many times in the driveway playing a game of horse with her.

She coached Volleyball, Basketball, and Track when she taught High School as well.

So I would like to say thank you to her, not only for helping devlop my love of sports, but for all the other wonderful things that she has done.

Friday, July 24, 2009

Top Five Places I have visited outside of WI

So to continue on with my top 5 lists, here is one of top give places I have visited outside of Wisconsin. Now I can't say that I am well traveled, since I haven't traveled overseas anywhere, but I have seen a good amount of the lower 48.

In no particular order

1. Lower 9th Ward, New Orleans. I traveled to New Orleans for work around 1 year after Katrina hit. I talked with a Travel Agent who broke down, talking about how he had to leave his dogs behind as he evacuated, and looked at pictures of flood waters covering highways and seeping into homes. I drove through neighborhoods where you can see the water lines half way up the sides of homes. One of the nights, I was able to go to the lower ninth ward with a police officer. He drove me through what was left of the neighborhood. Places where all that was left of homes was the cement slab that the house was built on. It was a very powerful experience. I got to go back to New Orleans last year as well. It was great to see the city was rebounding as it had. It is so rich with culture, that it would be a shame to see it disappear.

2. Philly. Growing up, my family took a lot of vacations that centered around historical things. I wish that I would have appreciated them more. I really have liked Philly, it was amazing walking through Independence Hall, to stand where the likes of Washington and Jefferson laid the groundwork for our country. The food was awesome as well. It is also the first real vacation that Mandy, Trevor and I took together.

3. You can't have a list without Disney on it. This is the first vacation I remember taking. We drove to Florida. Since I was 8 when we went, I don't remember a whole lot. We got soaked at Sea World, had a great sea food dinner, where I ate peal and eat shrimp for the first time, and spent some time at Disney as well. Saw a 3D movie with Michael Jackson, rode the Norway ride in Epcot, got ran over by Goofy. Met some kids at the pool from Sun Prairie WI. I tried to impress them by doing a back flip into the pool and ended up hitting my head on the side of the pool. I also played lot of punch out in the hotels arcade. I guess I remember more than I thought I would.

4. Driving out to Colorado. The thing I remember most was looking off in the distance as we got close to Colorado, and seeing the shiloute of the mountains in the distance. Being amazed at how big they were, and then realizing we were still a far ways off. Watching them grow as we got closer. This is the trip where I made my parents stop so we could see the 10 Thousand Pound Prairie Dog at one of the road side tourist traps. Turned out to be a stone statue. We also were in Sturgis during the Harley Rally, it was amazing seeing all of the Harley's together.

5. For the last one I am going to have to go with Vegas. Seeing the strip all lit up for the first time, is a pretty awesome sight. I got to see my friends get remarried at the little white wedding chapel, take in Spamalot, eat dinner next to a NFL Head Coach, and do some gambling. I have also gone back 3 times for work. Going to Vegas on the company dollar can be fun. Hanging out at the Voodoo Lounge on the top of the RIO has provided me with some great views of Vegas.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Time Travel

So today at work the subject of time travel came up. Any time I can discuss the mind blowing possibilities of time travel I will. Todays conversation took on a very interesting topic. Time Travel Cheating.

I posed the following question to one of my friends. If her husband went back in time, and slept with Marilyn Monroe, would she be upset? I was fairly positive her answer would be Hell No, and it was. But she brought up an interesting loop hole.

She said that she would be okay with him going back 7 years, to a period of time before the two of them had met. Giving the time machine to his younger self, and allowing him to go back in time to sleep with Marilyn Monroe.

At the end of the day he gets to sleep with Marilyn Monroe, and his wife is okay with it. Talk about a Win Win.

Unless meeting with the act of meeting himself causes a rip in the space time continuum and life as we know it ceases to exist. I guess he could send me back to tell young him to use the time machine.

Anyway, I like time travel.

Sunday, July 12, 2009


So it is that time of year again where I put my best foot forward and try and lose some weight. It is based around a weight loss challenge at work again. This time you are encouraged to choose a team of ten people to work with to accomplish your goals. With the chance to win many great prizes along the way.

I have talked most of my team into doing this together, since I have taken the roll as team captain, I feel like I probably should set a great example.

So I have scoured the Internet for some inspiration. Some weight loss tips. I came across on old system, but one that is time tested. The PerkisSystem, by Tony Perkis. He started up a camp for overweight youth, and used the summer to put together a hit weight loss program. I hope to PerkiSize my way to a healthy body.

We will see...

Saturday, July 11, 2009

Top 5 Live Sports Moments

So this list is either moments I have been a part of, or seen live in person...

In no particular order...

1. State Track in 1997. This is where Gabe Jennings ran the 1600 Meter in 4:04. He dominated the race, and to watch a high schooler approach breaking the 4 min mile mark was awesome. Even more impressive because he was running against the clock. He wasn't being pushed or helped by anyone.

2. Cross Country Junior and Senior year. I lumped these two together, because I can. They were two amazing seasons. Junior year we won conference. I was our 7th runner and I believe I was 17th. We also then placed second at Sectionals and made it to State. The difference in Cross Country over other sports is that once the race is done, you know how individuals placed, but you don't know team scores. So they go through and announce the team scores. The suspense as they read off each team name is crazy. Then hearing them read off the third place team, and it not being you, and realizing you just qualified for state is an awesome feeling. Senior year we lost two of our top runners due to injury, so I went from being the 7th runner to being the 5th, which meant more score counted. We didn't win conference this year, so we were not as confident going into Sectionals, but again names were read, and they were not ours. We placed second again to make it to State. Running at State is a very interesting experience, just because of the crowd size.

3. The run to the State Football title for my high schools football team my junior year. It was great watching a group of classmates and friends roll through and undefeated season ultimately win the state title was awesome. In cross country, we ran state at a golf course in Wisconsin Rapids, the football team got to play at Camp Randal. Just a great team to watch, hey had 4 rushers go for 1,000 yards.

4. Attending the Brewers playoff game last year. I remember going to my first Brewer game at County Stadium as a kid, I remember listening to Brewer games in my room, and keeping track of starting line ups. My Paul Molitor poster on the wall to my Milwaukee Brewers batting glove. The Brewers are the sports team that I have followed the longest, and been the most loyal to. So just getting to see the Brewers in the playoffs was an amazing experience. I wish they would have won, but the fact that they lost does not take away from the experience. Plus, the Phillies ended up winning the World Series, so I got to see the Worlds Series champs play in the playoffs.

5. Track and Field day in 8th grade. My school had a day at the end of the school year where you could compete in different Track and Field events. In 8th Grade my father decided that he would compete with the 8th grade boys in the Mile. The mile has always been my favorite race, and while I knew I wasn't going to win, based on the fact that Nate Wolff was running, I was worried that my father would beat me. He was in pretty good shape, and ran on a regular basis, so I was not 100% confident I could beat him, but I set it as my goal. Since it made my list, I am sure you all already assume that I beat him, which I did. He came in third. Not only was it memorable since I beat my dad, it was also one of the few sports moments we shared. My father never was that sports inclined, he doesn't have a big interest in them, nor is he very good at any of them. Since sports have been such a big part of my life, it was cool to have this one moment with my dad.

Friday, July 10, 2009

Soundtrack.....To my life

So I have been kicking around the idea of putting together a soundtrack to my life. I have a lot of songs that bring up specific memories. I thought that it might be cool (and morbid) to start compiling the songs, and jotting down the memories. That way when I die, in like 85 years, at my funeral they can give everyone in attendance a copy of the CD, or whatever the equivalent will be then. Along with a book, or whatever the equivalent will be, of all the memories. They can then listen to the songs, and read the memories, weep quietly about how awesome I was.

I will toss a few out now.

I think most people would agree that Ice Ice Baby, would be the first song on the CD. This one spawns many memories, but none better than the time Nate, Andy and I road tripped (with Andy's Mom) to Milwaukee to see Vanilla Ice in concert. If I haven't told you the story yet, ask me about it.

I will probably expand on these other songs down the road, but I want to get them out of my head and down here while I remember. By no means are these my favorite songs, just ones that spark memories.

Angels Robbie Williams
Billie Jean Michael Jackson
Faithful Go West
Bouncing Round the Room Phish
Paint It Black Rolling Stones
Where It's At Beck
My Heart Will Go On Celine Dion

Monday, July 6, 2009

Top 5: Movies

So I have decided to try and do a top 5 list a week. To start it off, I will tackle top 5 favorite movies. Feel free to chime in with your own lists.

My top 5 in no particular order

1. Babe

That's right, the movie with the talking pig. For those of you that know me, I really enjoy movies with talking animals. For me Babe is the penultimate talking animal movie. The scene where Farmer Hoggett sings to Babe after he spends the night in the rain. Gets me every time.

2. Braveheart

I have come to love epics, Lawrence of Arabia, Bridge on the River Kwai, etc. The classics came later for me, Braveheart came first. Stories where people overcome overwhelming odds seems to really appeal to me. The final scene with William Wallace, when he yells Freedom. Awesome.

3. Almost Famous

This movie has grown on me over the last few years. The cast is great. I really like all of the major players. The music choices are amazing. You can't help but sing along during Tiny Dancer. It's really layered as well. As I age, I find myself identifying with different characters. When I come across this movie on TV, I can't help but stop and watch.

4. Kill Bill

This is somewhat cheating as I am taking two movies as one. Since they were shot together, I think I can take the liberty with it. I love a good revenge story, and also a movie with a strong female lead (one of the reasons I love Buffy the Vampire Slayer). You take the amazing fight scenes, and top if off with Tarinto dialogue and I am sold.

5. Tommy Boy

This is probably the movie I quote the most, and I probably now a days don't even realize I am doing it. It's a movie that is guaranteed to make me laugh. I don't expect this movie to change my views on things, or win any awards, it is just good fun. Chris Farley and David Spade were a great pairing.

Honorable Mention:

Grave of the Fireflies--I have seen this movie twice, which is more than most people can do, it really tears at you

Unforgiven-- I love a good western, and this is one of the best

The Good the Bad and the Ugly-- See above

Clerks-- Kevin Smith, enough said

Rushmore-- Great cast, and I love movies based around High School, this is one of my favorites

Paths of Glory-- Stumbled upon this one when having to pick a movie to write a paper on for a class, this one was at the end of the semester, which gave me time to slack. Ended up really enjoying this film.

Dr. Strangelove-- Funny as hell, and a movie that still holds up. You can trade out the Russians for Iranians or North Koreans and the movie would work today.

The Dark Crystal-- I can't get enough Jim Henson, and this movie is classic.

Seven Samurai-- Awesome, Awesome, Awesome.

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

How Twitter has ruined my blog.

So as you have noticed I have not blogged as much lately. I blame twitter. I have sat down numerous times with the intention of blogging. Only to realize that I seem to only think within the space of 140 characters.

Today is a different day though. I am going to plug through it, and bring it.

It has been a crazy time at work. The company I work for has a new CEO. I have been fortunate enough to have spent some time with him already. Including a trip to Chicago. While our former CEO was, and still is a pilar in our industry, I am excited as to what the new guy has to bring.

We also are in the midst of a move to our new 125,000 square foot building. The move is taking place over 4 weeks, and unfortunately I move in the last group. I have been over to the new building a couple times now, and actually hung out and worked out of my office for a little bit today. It will be nice to have every one in the same building though. Instead of running 5 blocks to talk to IT when something breaks, I can walk down a flight of stairs.

With summer upon us, I have had many weekends as well. Last weekend we met up some friends for a fun weekend in Milwaukee. I took place in my first duck race, and it was awesome. It was almost a photo finish, with a duck passing in the last few feet to win. Even got to hang out with a duck racing champ, as Chief took home 3rd place. I also ate a Strawberry Brat, which was much better than expected. We then took a dinner cruise around Milwaukee which was all the tacos you could eat and margarittas you could drink. Which seems to equal 8 bachlorette parties on our boat. But hey, I was on a boat!


We then got in 9 holes of golf in the morning, and watched the Brewers get hammered.

This weekend we are packing up the fam and heading to Monroe to celebrate our countries independence by going to a drive in, and golfing.

I am trying to figure out how to make it down to see DMB at Alpine in July, or I might head to Chicago in Sept. to see Kevin Smith.

Sophia is now officially crawling, which means she gets herself into trouble. She seems to like the dogs water dish.

Well, I am about burnt out. I will try to come back more often.

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Big City Living

So I headed to a meeting in Chicago on Wednesday. It was neat to be part of the big city work culture, if just for a few hours. Sometimes I think I would like to get lost in the hustle and bustle of a major metroploitan area.

Ride the train into work, head to my high rise building, and my job at a booming internet business, where I get to wear jeans, and work with a guy called Skeeter. I would eat at any number of hip bistros just a stones throw from my building.

After work, grab a drink at our local "hangout", and then hop the train back home.

It seems like such a different world than good old Stevens Point.

That being said, I enjoy my 10 soon to be 2 minute commute to work. I don't mind the buiness casual atmposphere, and I don't have to worry about my company going out of business. So while I think it may be fun, I know at the end of they day, I prefer it right where I am.

Friday, June 12, 2009


So I was one of those nerds, who watched the countdown on Facebook so I could get the username I wanted. I am now officially,

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Is this my 15 minutes of fame?

So I do the Twitter as some of you know. I follow a handful of people, one of which is @paulandstorm they make me smile, so I like to keep up with what they do. Well, yesterday Paul tweeted that he was flying solo on the podcast they do and was looking for some things to talk about. I sent over the question I posed here earlier, if you could watch the films of one actor/actress who would it be.. I had a half day at work, and was cleaning the kitchen, so I decided to see if by any slim chance he actually read my question.

I have to report, not only did he read the question (and mention my name), he gave one hell of an answer, Jimmy Stewart, and then posted the question on their website for all to answer.

Now millions of people are sitting at home, deep in thought, over a question I posed. Bards are writing songs about the complexity of thought I must posses to come up with such a question. Women are waiting to throw themselves at me (sorry ladies, I am taken). Children are are putting plans in motion, so they can grow up and be like me.

Or not.

None the less, it is was a very cool experience. If this is the 15 minutes I get, I can happily except it.

Monday, June 8, 2009

All by myself...

So Mandy is in Milwaukee for work, and I am home alone with the kids. I have found that it makes me more efficient. Got home, did dinner, put Sophia in her PJs, got Trev in the shower. Did a load of laundry, ironed my shirt. Everyone in bed by nine, with the house cleaned.

Not sure how the morning will go, but as long as I can get up and showered before Sophia gets up I think I am going to be fine.

I hope.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009


So I get to pick a piece of artwork for my new office. At first I figured I would get like 4 options to choose from. Man was I wrong. I have like 2 million choices to choose from. Because of that I need your help. I have already spent like 6 hours pouring through art at So far my two favorites are:

Here and Here

Keeping in mind that I can't get to crazy. They have made it known, that the art stays with the office, so they want something neutral.

Anyway, feel free to weigh in on either of the two I have, or check out, and peruse the Art Print section to see if you can find something else I may like.

Friday, May 22, 2009

A sign from God...

So just a couple days after my whole, I am sure Jesus's story sounded crazy back in the day, post I received a birthday card from the church I used to go to.

1. I have never received a birthday card from them. Ever. Even when I was going to it.

2. I haven't set foot through the church doors in over 8 years. I haven't gone to the church on a regular basis since I was in 8th grade.

3. I have no idea who the current Pastor is.

4. I have no idea how they got my address, granted they sent it to my old address, but I have no idea how they got that either.

5. The cover of the card is a picture of the front of the church, where there is a giant picture of Jesus floating in the air.

6. I assume that I am now going to hell.

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Where I almost defend Scientology...

So today in conversation after a person at work that follows me on Twitter made the observation that I really like "Almost Famous", I advised her that because of that movie, Jason Lee almost made it on the top of my list of the one actor I would choose if I only could watch the work of one actor. She agreed he was good, but said she couldn't get over the fact that he was a Scientologist.

Now, I think Scientology is a load of crap. Though I do enjoy a lot of Scientologists. Such as Beck and Jason Lee. I do admit that they do a good job of recruiting cool celebrities.

Anyway the conversation lead to how I think that Scientology is no more ridiculous than any other religion. It gets a bum rap do to the fact it was created by a science fiction writer and is fairly recent, as religions go.

I am sure that in the time of Jesus people thought the Apostles were crazy as well. I can see it now....

Peter: Hey Billy, do you have a minute for me to tell you about Jesus?

Billy: The guy that works with his brother Jose doing landscaping?

Peter: No...JESUS, as in Jesus Christ!

Billy: Haven't heard of the guy.

Peter: The guy is the son of God, you mean you haven't heard of the son of God?

Billy: Whose God?

Peter: Holy Crap Billy, sit down, let me tell you a tale.

Billy: You have 2 minutes. Start talking the Sun Dial is ticking.

Peter: So this lady Mary, was told by an Angel.

Billy: An Angel?

Peter: Think of it as a man, with wings like a bird, that lives in Heaven.

Billy: Heaven?

Peter: It's like a house in the clouds.

Billy: Birdman that lives in the sky, check.

Peter: Anyway, this Angel comes and tells Mary that she is pregnant. She is confused since she is a virgin. The Angel tells her that she is pregnant with the son of God.

Billy: Is Mary married?

Peter: Yes to Joseph.

Billy: He didn't care that his wife was pregnant with another mans baby?

Peter: Not just a man, GOD.

Billy: Anyway.

Peter: So Mary and Joseph end up having Jesus in a manger.

Billy: So the son of God was born in a manger, was it one of those converted mangers, that all the kids live in these days.

Peter: NO, it was your standard manger, animals and all.

Billy: Alright

Peter: Anyway flash forward 20-30 years and Jesus is spreading the word and performing miracles. Walking on water, turning water into wine, feeding like 3 million people with two fish and a loaf of bread.

Billy: Wait a minute. Flash forward 20-30 years? What happened to this guy growing up.

Peter: Not important.

Billy: So when you say he walked on water, you mean he walked in water right?

Peter: Nope, he walked ON water.

Billy: Well, I am riveted so far, what happens next.

Peter: Let me cut to the good part.

Billy: You mean we haven't heard the good part yet?

Peter: So Jesus gets crucified and died, FOR YOUR SINS!

Billy: I guess that was nice of him.

Peter: Then get this, three days after he died, he rose from the dead! Then he ascended into heaven, to be seated at the right hand of God.

Billy: So he dies, comes back to life, sprouts wings and flies up to Heaven, to play catch with his dad?

Peter: Well not quite.

Billy: So let's recap. This God character sleeps with this married lady. Doesn't care enough to spring for a nice place for the birth, so baby pops out in a barn. Fast forward this bastard is all grown up, and running a magic act, where he walks on water. He eventually goes into performance art, gets stung up on a cross. "Dies", then three days later, sits up and flies up to his house in the sky.

Peter: Well when you put it that way....


Anyway, I've also decided that the top level in Scientology, the level you get to once you have donated enough money, is that they bring you into a room. Pop in a video of old L RON, and you hear him tell you that it is all made up. To keep you quiet, they cut you in on the profit that they make. So in essence it is the worlds largest pyramid scheme.

Thursday, May 14, 2009

There can be only one...

So the other day on a walk, I started thinking about if I was allowed to only watch the work of one actor for the rest of my life, who would I choose. I ended with two suprising choices. Bill Murray or Jason Lee. Ultimately Bill Murray won.

You have Caddy Shack, Stripes, Ghostbusters, Groundhog Day, almost all of the Wes Anderson movies, Lost in Translation, etc., etc.

With Jason Lee you get the most of the Kevin Smith collection, My Name is Earl, Almost Famous, A Guy Thing, The Incredibles, etc., etc.

Ultimately Bill Murray has just done more, though he has never done this...

I'm not sure what acress I would go with though. Natalie Portman is on the list, or maybe Christina Ricci.

Monday, May 11, 2009

They have me all wrong.

So I am signed up to get some random advertisements in my email. Today I got this one.

This is wrong on so many levels.

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Happy Mothers Day

Just wanted to take a minute to wish my wife, Mother, and Grandmother a Happy Mothers Day. Since I am in a good mood, Happy Mothers Day to all the rest of you mothers that visit this little slice of the internet.

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

You make me wanna Snoop

In honor of Snoop's birthday I just wanted to give him a shout out.

I've known Snoop for quite a few years now. We met through a mutual friend (thanks Chief and Natalie). He has been a great friend ever since.

He is a master googler, a damn fine golfer, a fan of the bobblehead, a master planner, a great husband, and an awesome friend.

Hope your birthday was filled with Unicorns and Pixie Dust!

Straight to the top of my Netflix Queue

They sure knew how to scare you in the '70's

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Jumping out of a Pool

You may have seen this already, but it is pretty impressive. They guy was just drafted by the Bears. He weighs 290, and is jumping our of a pool three feet deep.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Happy Earth Day!!

In celebration of Earth Day, I decided to give a shout out to one of my closest friends who now lives so far away...Nelli.

It really is perfect timing. As today I received a jar of her amazing mustard. I can't tell you how great it is. I literally wanted to eat it with a spoon. I refrained, but it was hard. I have two pork chops waiting in the fridge for the mustard to arrive, and lunch tomorrow will be heavenly.

So, the mustard's arrival, coupled with a day that Nelli holds dear, I thought it would be a good time to talk about all things Nell.

I have know Nell for over 20 years now. My memories go back to pre Kindergarten. I remember a birthday party at her house. I was the only boy, because Nate had to go to some wedding. The only thing I remember was Becky Beversdorf (from what I remember) slammed her hand in the door.

The first bike I rode, was Nelli's. I am sure it was pink and frilly.

After Kindergarten Nelli and I parted ways, I went to Eland she went to Wittenberg. We met back up in 6th grade in Middle School. We hung out in the same circles through High School and into College.

It was always a fun timing hanging out with Nell. From late nights roaming the neighborhoods of Wausau or hanging out on Alanna's trampoline, it was always a good time.

She was the first person that found out we were having a baby in college, and helped bring Trevor home from the hospital.

One thing has been constant throughout the years, that Nelli has been an amazing friend. Even though she now lives, like a million miles away. She is still a great friend, and sends me mustard.

I enjoy reading her husbands blog (by the way, Austin is a great guy as well, and I am happy the two of them met) and keeping up on the adventures that they take. I look forward to hearing about the newest chapter and their time in Alaska.

So, thanks for being awesome Nell, and Happy Earth Day.

Oh, PS, today for each policy sold, we donated a tree.

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Triva Post Mortem

The one thing would really like to get my hands on is how much of an impact Trivia has on the Internet. With a couple thousand people all searching for the same thing, during a short span, has to result in some pretty interesting Google Analytics pages. It would be crazy to look at your blogs stats, and see that 5,000 people in Stevens Point were at your blog. Yay bloggers for blogging about some obscure things. It came in handy.

Not that I didn't have a fun time last year, but this year's Trivia was much more enjoyable for me. We had a better set up, more people, and no one wanted to kill anyone come the end of the weekend (at least not that I know of).

I also start to see things we can do, to move up even further in the standings. The biggest tip I got was from a guy I work with on the team that finished 8th. He said, they don't do much prep work, they don't assign anyone specific jobs or things to study. They just record all of the questions and answers. Then once the contest is done, they go through the ones they got wrong, and look for ways they could have found the answers. Then log potential solutions, along with the questions and answers. That way they can use it as a giant reference the next year. He advised that as you look at questions year to year, you start to see paterns and common themes. Which only helps.

The other thing I was thinking about doing, was building a database of info. Sports records, TV show casts, slogans. That way it can be searched without relying on the Internet. I noticed that a lot of times I was waiting for a page to load, because 7,000 other people were trying to look at the same thing, at the same time.

I think that if we keep building on what we have, the Loonery will be a team cracking the top 50 on a regular basis.

Friday, April 17, 2009

For Austin

The Mustached Falcon


It's that time of year again, when hordes of people, well 10-20 show up with laptops sit in my basement, and search for ridiculus answers to ridiculus questions. As my friend Jerry says, it is more of the worlds largest research contest, than the worlds largest trivia contest. Either way you cut it, it is a fun time.

This won't be the last update tonight, or this weekend. Currently I am on 13 hours awake, 2 hours of contest.

Monday, April 6, 2009

Al Qaeda is recruitting Possums

From CNN:

Weeks after the National Park Service caught a raccoon who'd been stalking White House grounds, Capitol Police nabbed another furry fugitive Monday: a possibly rabid possum spotted near the Rayburn House Office Building.

As the possum took refuge in a nearby tree, officers isolated the area and called for animal control officials. Animal control caged and removed the animal from the scene so its condition could be determined.

Hey Possum, who the hell do you think you are. What gives you the right to wander around our nations Capital, and with rabies none the less. Is this how it's going to be. Try and take over the world one rabies victim at a time? Don't think playing dead is going to get you out of it either. One more false move and you will have this to deal with...

Sunday, April 5, 2009

Thank You Baby Jesus

Wow, two posts about Jesus in a month, but I was reminded of something today, that has bothered me for a long time.

Why do people thank Jesus after winning things? I never see people thanking Jesus for giving them the ability to cross the road, or brush their teeth. They always thank Jesus after winning something. Today I watched the end of one of the Women's Final Four games, and in an interview with one of the girls from the winning team, stopped to thank Jesus. Like Jesus had an interest in the outcome of the game. I am fairly certain he did not. I coached basketball at a Catholic High School. We won one game all season. We had someone from the school come in and lead us in prayer before each game. The only thing we could do to make our team closer to God, would have been to fill the water bottles with holy water, and we won once. Jesus has more important things to do, than watch a basketball game.

What really blows my mind is when people thank baby Jesus. Why baby Jesus? I am pretty sure baby Jesus didn't do much more than eat, sleep, and crap in his Holy Huggies. I mean at least the older Jesus, did things, spread the word, taught people to fish, walked on water, and rose from the dead.

Anyway, I just wanted to get that out. I promise no more Jesus for a while.

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

5 things

Thanks to Rainn Wilson on Twitter, I came across a very cool blog. They posed a question of what 5 things you would cut off your pinky toe for. Which is a very interesting idea.

Unfortunately the people at this blog are a bunch of nancies, and said:

1. end war
2. find a cure for cancer
3. be weightless in outer space
4. save someones life
5. lots and lots of dollars

Outside of 3 and 5 they are doing some cosmic sucking up. All you would cut off for a cure for cancer would be a toe? I am fairly certain that if someone came up to me and said that if I cut off my right arm, cancer would be cured forever, I'd be all, wheres the hacksaw and stick to bite on. Also, cutting off a toe, is not going to cure cancer. Since it is just a toe, it should be something that someone actually has the ability to offer you, so you would actually have to weight how much you enjoy your toes. God isn't going to come down from heaven, and be all, "Hey Jimmy, I was thinking that this whole war thing has really run it's course. Since I can't just end war without anything in return, your going to need to lop off a toe for me."

Here is my five:

1. Being offered the position of Vice President of the United States
2. 5 Million Dollars...well 1 million dollars most likely, but a certain if it is 5 million
3. A staring role in a Muppet Movie...or Wes Anderson Movie
4. To be on an NBA roster, with a 5 year roster gurantee
5. Free groceries for life

What's yours?

Saturday, March 28, 2009

A Bevy of Things

I hate being reduced to blogging just on the weekend, but it has been a busy week. So here is a bevy of things to get you updated.

1. I am trying this whole twittering thing the kids are doing these days. I don't find that I have enough time to keep up on things, or have much to say, so I don't twitter much. Also in my infinite wisdom, started following the my boss on twitter. (ridiculus idea I know) We have been having a lot of conversations at work about Social Networking sites, and he mentioned he started a Twitter account, to see what it was all about. So I said I had an account as well. So far he isn't following me though. At this point, I can only hope he dosen't.

2. While I am talking work, most of my week was spent either prepping for or being at our sales meeting. We hadn't had one since 2007, so we brought the sales team in, which is about 70 people when you combine the inside and outside sales team. I got to spend a good amount of time in front of the group presenting and running things. Everyone said I did a good job, so hopefully it has won me some points with the execs in the room.

3. I watched Twilight today. Sorry dear, but it was crap. I enjoy vampire stories. The Historian is one of my favorite books, and Buffy the Vampire Slayer was one of my favorite shows. Twlight can't hold Buffys stake bag. The misses was all, wasn't the fight at the end awesome. I was all, I saw a better fight between Angel and Spike on an episode of Angel, so no, it wasn't awesome. I won't mock it further though, since the wife likes it.

4. I am going to admit. I have a slight celeb crush on Kate, from Jon and Kate plus 8. I have no idea why, but I do.

5. I did though watch a good movie. After Twilight, we watched Role Models. Very Funny movie.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Stop the Press

Thanks to TMZ, I have learned that MC Hammer and Vanilla Ice, may be touring. It's mind blowing how awesome this might be.

Monday, March 23, 2009

I guess I attract hippies.....on Twitter

So I joined Twitter. Mainly to check it out a bit, and see how it works, for some research I am doing for work. I currently have three followers. One is the Onion, which seems to just add you if you have added them. The other two are some "green" organizations. No idea how they found me, or why they added me.

Now if I can only get my BB set up so I can update on the go, I might make more use out of this thing.

Friday, March 20, 2009

I am a Ninja!


I really should be sleeping, since it is after one, and I have to go to a wedding tomorrow, but I can't without blogging first.

The NCAA Basketball Tournament, is some of the best TV ever. I am a basketball nut. I have loved the sport since I was in 1st grade and spent an entire recess, trying to make my first basket. I did, right before the bell rang. I played through High School. Some of my happiest times were on the basketball court. I can fully admit, that the hardest I have ever worked at something, was during basketball games my senior year.

I loved playing. Since I was coming off of Cross Country season, I was typically in better shape than most, so I could run circles around people. I enjoyed trash talking opponents, and diving after lose balls. I wasn't the most talented offensive player, but I would always take pleasure in the floor burns I would acquire during the games. I wasn't anything spectacular, but I did have two colleges (one D3and one two year school) offer to let me play in college.

So when it comes time for March Madness, my love of the game creeps back up. I cheer for the Badgers, who one in OT tonight and pull for the Cinderella stories. I buzzer beater is a thing of beauty and agony all at the same time.

I look forward to it each year.

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Shout Out

My brother is back in town. He flew in today for a wedding next weekend. He lives in San Fran, so it was nice to see him. He also got to meet Sophia for the first time.

His girlfriend, Melissa (I appoligize if you spell it another way, with a y perhaps, or one s, or two l's, or with two z's, Melizza) is also with him. Since she said that she finds my blog funny at times, she is officially awesome.

Wayne Gretzky vs Jesus

As I have said in the past, I listen to SMODcast, which is a podcast by Kevin Smith and Scott Mosier. The podcasts I enjoy most are when the conversation turns to religion. Kevin was raised Catholic, but is more of a non-practicing Catholic these days, and Scott for all intensive purposes seems to be an atheist.

Todays conversation turned to how Wayne Gretzky is like Jesus. There is the obvious similarity of walking on water (for those of you that don't know, Wayne Gretzky played hockey, so it is more of skating on frozen water, but you get the comparison).
Both of them had devout followings, did things that others could not, were seemingly really nice people.

Which made me think a lot about religion. I don't really want to talk religion here. I will for a minute though. I like the idea of religion being something that you believe in, not something that you believe.

Here is my criteria for the difference in the two. Believe in, means it's tangible. You can see it, hear it, watch it, be part of it. You don't have doubts about what happened, or took place. You can believe in what happened, or what someone stood for.

To believe, means blind faith. You are jumping from the cliff with faith that the hand of god will catch you. Jesus was the son of God, he was crucified, died, and was burried. On the third day he rose and ascended in to Heaven. He will come again to judge the living and the dead. You don't need proof, you just believe.

I like the idea, that you believe in becoming a better person because Wayne Gretzky is a good person. I don't think I would choose Wayne Gretzky, but I can see building a belief system based on how Martin Luther King Jr, Gandhi, Mother Teresa, etc. lived their lives. I also like the idea, that you want to become a better person because Jesus was. I just don't think you should limit yourself to Jesus.

This next statement leans on the controversial side, so be prepared. I don't believe that Jesus is the son of God. I believe he was a good person, who believed in a higher power, and doing good things. I am confident that if you go back in time, and tell Jesus that in the future, a religion would be based around the belief that he was the son of God, he would punch you square in the face.

I am not against organized religion. I was raised Lutheran, and at the end of the day think I am a much better person for going to church, and learning what I did. I do have issues with the way organized religion's have abused their power for things such as money, power, and land. It blows my mind that wars have been fought, and lives lost due to religious differences. I find it crazy that a religion is based on the ideas of a Science Fiction writer. I think it is insane to think if you strap a bomb to yourself, and blow yourself up, that you believe you get 40 virgins in the afterlife. I also think it is crap that you can be a horrible person, confess on your death bed and all is forgiven.

Anyway, I will hop down of my soapbox.

Saturday, March 14, 2009

I probably would have told her no as well.

So it seems that Miley Cyrus is going to ruin Radiohead. Apparently she begged her manager at the Grammy's to get the chance to meet Radiohead. When Radiohead was approached, they declined. To their credit, they also turned down Kanye West's people as well. So they are equal opportunity denyers.

That being said. Why is Miley Cyrus even at the Grammy's. Have they sunk that low for ratings, that they need to let Miley Cyrus and the Jonas Brothers perform?

Anyway, I really enjoy Radiohead, which is more so the reason for the post. I first heard them on MuchMusic out of Canada. When I was growing up, we couldn't get cable where we lived, and when my parents finally decided to get Dish, we didn't get the fancy package, which had MTV and VH1. We got the standard package, which came with MuchMusic. Which I loved. I heard so many bands, before I heard them in the US. One of which was Radiohead (another was the Back Street Boys, which I knew of about a year before they hit it big in the US, lucky me).

Thursday, March 12, 2009

How Mustard Was Ruined Forever

On New Years Eve, a friend brought with her the worlds best mustard. It was like a spicy honey mustard. It was heavenly. I would eat it every day if possible. About a month ago, I used the last of this mustard of the gods, with some pork chops. Since then, I have tried to avoid meals where I would use some store bought spicy brown mustard, hoping that over time the taste would fade, and I would be able to enjoy the mustard that mere mortals eat.

I failed.

Today we had pork chops, and with them, I used what used to be a very tasty mustard. Today it was crap.

Since the mustard is home made, I may never taste that magnificent mustard again.

So, I have been to the top of Mustard Mountain, and have since slid down those spicy brown slopes, to the bottom.


Sunday, March 8, 2009


I am fairly certain I have blogged about naps before, but I am going to do it again.


I decided today, while Sophia took a nap, that I would as well. I put in my new noise reducing ear buds for my Ipod, used the Genius app(which deserves it's own blog post) to create a playlist, and drifted off to sleep.

If I were to plan my perfect day, I would have two hours set aside for napping. A nap from 1-3 is about the perfect time.

Here is my new guilty You Tube pleasure. I like like, Garfunkel and Oates.

Friday, March 6, 2009

Sugar High and the Amish

Today I drove by Office Max and saw some Amish people, leaving Office Max with some boxes, on the way to get into their horse drawn buggy. What do you think they were buying? I want to think they buy electronics to sacrifice them to their corn gods.

Also, I have been on a sugar high all week long. I was in Shopko, and wanted to get a box of Milk Duds, I ended up buying two boxes of Milk Duds, two boxes of Mike and Ikes, and a box of Dots. I basically ate them non stop for 3 days. Then it is the opening day for Belts (local ice cream shop in town) and our work gets everyone a big twist ice cream on opening day. So I am a bit jittery, and I imagine my urine tastes like Kool Aide.

One more item, Congrats to Snoop and Alexis on the purchase of their new house. It looks great. I am looking forward to many cookouts and lawn games this summer.

Ninja Bear

He will own you!

Sunday, March 1, 2009

Stuck in my head

This song has been stuck in my head all weekend. From my head to yours.

Baby Giggle Alarm Clocks

The past couple of days I was awaken by baby giggles. You can't be mad in the morning when you are jolted from your sleep by a giggiling baby. You also can't hit the "snooze" button, and fall back a sleep.

So I think I should created the, Alarm Clock Baby, and get the ShamWow guy to be my pitch man.

Any investors?

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

How I almost got picked up for child abduction.

Well not really, but that is how my thought process went. This morning on the way to work, I saw a kid walking to school in the freezing rain. He was soaking wet, looked like he was going to catch his death, and had a good distance yet to go. I thought about pulling over and seeing if he would like a ride the rest of the way to work. Than I thought better of it.

I wasn't sure that a stranger in a SUV, trying to talk a kid into getting into his vehicle would go over that well. I might have been a savior to the kid, but the risk wasn't worth it. When it came down to it, the facts of the case would be that I tried to lure a kid into my car. Regardless of how I defended my actions in this day and age, I would come off as the creepy guy. "He seemed like such a nice guy", they would say. "We had no idea he abducted children."

It wouldn't help that I am a Cubmaster of my son's cub scout pack. It would only add fuel to the fire.

So sorry soaking wet kid. Blame all of the crazies for having to walk in the rain.

Stealth Boat

Anybody want a Stealth Boat?

If I lived on the coast, I would totally try and aquire this boat. How awesome would it be to have a stealth boat. I could sail the seas, fighting pirates, with my stealth boat. I could turn the larger barge into my Batcave on the high seas.

Anybody in?

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

San Antonio

It's very possible that people in San Antonio think that Jeff and I are lovers. Maybe because of this.

Maybe because we went to the hotel bar, ordered a Grasshopper and a Screwdriver, then asked the bartender if it was okay that we took our drinks back to our room.

Overall the trip was great. Since I could type forever, here is a brief recap.

Weather was warm, which is good since it is the reason we left. The food was great, even though it made me sick Saturday night. I had BBQ, Tex-Mex, and Seafood. The seafood meal was delicious, though I believe I am allergic to lobster. The two times I have eaten lobster, I have become violently ill that night. A couple years ago in Philly, and Saturday night. Piano Bars are fun. We went to one Friday night, and they put on an amazing show. Anyone that can play Ice Ice Baby on the piano is okay with me. I really like missions, or any really old building. Anything that has stood for hundreds of years impresses me. I also like pictures of trees. Curvy, gnarly trees are awesome. The Riverwalk is a very cool place, I give San Antonio credit for taking a natural asset, and making it a driving force behind their local economy.

Anyway, lots of fun, and I recommend it to anyone.