Monday, August 24, 2009

Pirates and Ninjas

So I was listening to a podcast the other day, and they mentioned how the Internet (especially Facebook) to allow for a couple of things to really become popular.

Ninjas, Pirates, Zombies, Bacon, LOL Catz

This got me thinking, in 200 years, what will modern day profession will equate to their Ninjas and Pirates. (Of course, Zombies, Bacon, and LOL Catz will still be around, they are timeless)

Thinking it through, these two professions have very different traits, so when looking for the modern day equivalent you have to first understand what traits to look for.

Let's start with Ninjas. Ninjas are stealthy, they like to cut people with swords, you often don't know who they are, they potentially can be hired, and usually have a higher set of morals.

Potential Modern day Ninja Candidates:

Spy: Like Ninja, Spy is very general. It does not tie you down to one country. Spy could be someone in the CIA, KGB, or a double O. You often don't know who they are, and they have been known to use a sword.

Serial Killers: I know, the fist thing you think is you said higher set of morals. I argue this point with the fact that in 200 years, serial killers will be glamorized by Dexter. People will have forgotten the Ted Bundys and Jeffrey Dahmers and will be enamored by the killer you can take home to mom, Dexter Morgan. So along with that, you have a secret identity, and he knows his way around a knife.

Power Rangers: Don't laugh. They pretty much are modern day ninjas. Just crayola ninjas. In 200 years, time will again have washed away the campiness, an Power Rangers will be revered. Or they will be just as campy, which in turn will make it super cool.

Wild Card:
Teachers: In 200 years you will most likely take a pill when you hit 5, and instantly know everything. So teachers will become these mythical outlaw characters, that swoop in and teach you things, that you never thought you would know. Like long division, and the countries of the world. You will wake up the next day and think it was all a dream, until you find a paper on your desk, where you showed your work. The most mind blowing part will be paper.

Now on to Pirates. Pirates are lawless, dirty, willing to kill for a dirty glass of whiskey. They are loud, and if people don't know who you are, then you are not a good pirate.

Potential Modern Day Pirate Candidates

Republicans: There are many strong Republican personalities that are very polarizing, just like most pirates. You have your Rush Limbaugh's and Ann Coulters. Loud, brash, morally crooked. They often travel in groups, and as of late seem to like to launch attacks on unsuspecting people. They also now seem to carry loaded weapons into public places. All very Pirate like.

Terrorists: Nothing funny here about terrorism, just some very similar parallels. All lawless, willing to do underhanded things. They have secret hideouts, and are scattered all over the world. In 200 years, it is possible terrorist will be viewed as we view Pirates today.

80's/90's Movie Action Heroes: Your Steven Segals, Jean Claude VanDammes, Arnolds, Stalone's, and of course, Chuck Norris. Again as time moves on, reality an fiction tend to blur. The children of 2209 will sit down and watch Predator, Blood Sport, Under Siege, and Missing in Action, and see these men who lived outside of the law. Kicked Ass and took names.

Wild Card:

Pirates: The Pirates of today, could be the Pirates of tomorrow. While they are not as well known, there still are Pirates. From what I have heard, they make quite a good living for themselves. It is possible they are just waiting it out, to make a huge media blitz and rise into stardom. Or not.

Anyway, I would be happy to hear your thoughts.

1 comment:

quartergoddess said...

Whoa! Are you trying to get killed?

Here's the thing, you mark "zombies, bacon and LOL catz" as timeless, but ninjas and pirates as needing to be replaced?

The problem with that is zombies, bacon and LOL catz are just mythological creatures. They're not real, so they can't actually kick your ass.

Ninjas and pirates are real and are probably already planning your demise. AND since it's being planned by a ninja or a pirate, you probably won't even know it's coming until BOOM, you're dead.

At least with the ninjas anyway. Maybe you could stay away from the ocean, and avoid getting killed by a pirate. But, that's taking a pretty narrow view on what is a "pirate".

You may want to consider going underground for a little bit and waiting until the wrath of the pirates (you compared them to Republicans... totally disrespectful, dude) and ninjas (you compared them with serial killers and power rangers?) abates.

You may be waiting a long time though. Or maybe you just have a death wish. It's hard to tell...